MOM’S MEMORIES
OF BOB
AT HIS MEMORIAL
SERVICE
4/21/2005
These are just some of the things that I remember
about Bob.
Bob was 10 mos. old when his father & I went
on a cruise. My Mom was taking care of our 3 kids. When we returned, Bob gave me his first hug. Mom had taught
him how to hug while we were gone.
When Bob was a toddler, we realized something
was not quite right. After many visits to doctors and all kinds of tests, he
was finally diagnosed with Duchenne Muscular Dystrophy. I stayed with Bob at
the hospital when he had the muscle biopsy to confirm this. One night I woke
up and Bob was sitting in his crib singing the ‘Eensy Weensy Spider’. The
next afternoon a young doctor came in to tell us the news. He went to examine
Bob and Bob gave the doctor a hug!
When Bob was 6 ½, I was living in NJ with Rolf
and my 3 kids. Early one Sat. morning, Bob got up before anybody else and came
down to the kitchen. Somehow he managed to open the refrigerator door, stood
on a shelf, then opened the freezer door and proceeded to eat 6 boxes of Girl Scout Thin Mint Cookies. He was wired for about a week!
When Bob was 12 or 13 he asked me if he was going
to die. I told him that eventually everybody dies but we don’t know when. He asked about how his wheelchair would fit into a coffin. I told him he didn’t need his wheelchair. He put his
hands out and said ‘how am I going to get around in heaven?’ I told
him he didn’t need it in heaven because he wouldn’t have DMD. I said he could walk and run. He said ‘COOOOOL’ Then I thought, geez,
now he’s gonna want to die!!! Then he asked if he’d meet Abraham
Lincoln and George Washington up there. I said probably.
Bob used to get very frustrated when he couldn’t
walk very well and would fall a lot. The only way he knew to let out his frustrations
was by having a truck driver’s mouth which he usually got in trouble for. We’d
try to put him in time out but he was so stubborn, he’d tantrum for 2 hrs. sometimes.
One time he was mad at Rolf and he wanted to swear and call him some terrible names, but knew he’d be in trouble
for it. So he worked himself up and said ‘you, you, you, Pluto!!!’ We knew Pluto packed a punch!
When Bob was 15 and had his 1st electric
wheelchair he was somewhat of a maniac driver. Bob felt that he owned the road
and everyone else had to get out of his way. We lived in an apartment complex
in TX and sometimes you’d see Bob driving his wheelchair pulling about 8-10 kids on skateboards and rollerblades behind
him!
We almost lost Bob in March 1995. Doctors didn’t expect him to live or come off the ventilator.
But Bob proved them wrong. I asked Bob if he remembered when his heart
and breathing stopped. He said he saw a white light. I told him that was nice, thinking he probably had heard that from TV.
Then he said that God talked to him. I said ‘he did? What did he
say?’ Bob said that God told him he had to go back because God wasn’t
ready for him yet! I guess God needed another 10 yrs. to finally get ready for
Bob.
We were Sunday regulars at the Anchorage bar in Sunapee, NH. I worked at the Anchorage for the past
6 summers. We would go there to listen to music, talk to people and have his
‘usual’—an Oreo cookie frappe!
Bob thought the fireworks on the 4th
of July were just for him. I didn’t tell him otherwise.
Bob was a Yankees fan in the midst of Red Sox
territory, but that didn’t sway him.
Bob touched the lives of anyone who knew him. He was a very special young man and will always be remembered.
Bob brought joy to everyone he met.
Bob you’ll always be ‘My Guy’
and I’ll always be ‘Your Girl’
At Bob's Memorial Service, the Minister
said this saying and I think it fits Bob's life. At the time he didn't know who said this saying, but it turns out it's
by Abraham Lincoln:
LIVE A GOOD LIFE
…And in the end it’s not the years
in a life, but the life in the years.
Two days after Bob's Memorial Service
I found this plaque (below) in a gift shop in Bay Head, NJ. It's now hanging in what was Bob's Room.
